Asphalt: The final frontier
This is the story of a quest. And like all quests that make sense. The questor, is searching for something, or to achieve something. In this case the questor is trying to get a small piece of plastic with his face on it and his signature. That thing would of course be: A commemorative plate.
No, really the questor (which my spell check is telling me is not a real word but, I will use any way because if the spell check wants a column written with real words it can get it's own web site). I was in pursuit of a learner's permit. So I got the book and learned all sorts of interesting rules for driving I never knew. For instance did you know that if you are in the far most left lane on a divided highway you are not aloud to pass the automobile in front of you by going over the median. The government can take the fun out of anything! But the fact I could no longer pass people bat man style did not deter me from going to get my permit.
So my mom drove me down to the DMV. (I told her that if she really wanted me to pass this test she would let me drive down there.) We walked in the door of the place and hit, a line. This place was more popular than a nightclub. So after an hour we waited are way to the front were I got a little piece of paper with the DMV symbol on it (a car smashing into a wall). Below the symbol in huge letters was D793. The lady instructed me to go sit in one of the chairs that took up most of the space in the main room and wait until that number was called.
The waiting room was like line for the ride "Star Tours" at MGM studios in Disney world with the inter-galaxy space port. Just like in the "Star Tours" ride's line there were a bunch of people from different planets (no not different countries. Planets.) Waiting for a prerecorded woman's voice to say C3P0-or D793 as I was-please report to baggage terminal 12, your Ewok is eating a flight attendant. But in my case it was, please go to window 9 for eye insertion. So they had me strip to my down to my shorts and checked my lungs of typhoid, and used a hanger to peal back my eye lid to check for the black death of Captain Bengalese. Oh wait that was the immigrants coming threw Ellis Island! Here they just had me read the second line of a eye chart on a computer thing, and asked for my birthday, name, etcetera. Then the lady said to go and wait on the other side of the room for my name to be called. It was and they sent me to these computer terminals were I would take the written test. First they asked me the sample no-brainier stuff about you questions.
"Sample question 1: What is your name?
A) Herald Remis,
B) King Henry The IV,
C) Danny Patrick Scully,
D) all of the above."
The next one though thoroughly stumped me. The question was:
"Sample question 2: What is your date of birth?
A) 1/12/75
B) 4/8/91
C) 7/15/85
D)13/42/11 B.C.
I being born on 7/14/85 thought it must be a trick question. So I answered D)
After that the rest of the test went okay thought so in end I became the only 2011 year old ever to get a
learner's permit.